The Gift of 35 Years


Monday, my wife and I celebrated our 35th Wedding Anniversary!  Someone asked me, in all seriousness, “Does it really feel like 35 years?”  Well, the truth is, yes.  Now, I really don’t know what 35 years is supposed to feel like, but I will tell what 35 years has provided that is priceless—intimacy.

Now, the world has its own idea of what intimacy is, but for a couple that has used their 35 years to get to know each other, I will say the world doesn’t have a clue.  Intimacy is that special private bond between a couple that only they can understand, express, and enjoy.  They have worked at communicating with each other over the years through words, actions, gestures, deeds, the good and the hard. They have opened their hearts to each other through trust, vulnerability, risks, and faith.  They have developed a love language that is only translated by each other.  They have created a sense of security within that bond that allows for freedom, rest, and assurance.  There’s an ease in each other’s presence that never carries any guilt or regrets whether you are on the beach, in the kitchen, driving in the car or in the bedroom.  They may be in a very public place, but in an instant, they can be in a private world that no one can comprehend.

Intimacy comes through daily giving of yourself to each other in serving, loving, listening, caring, gazing, and connecting.  It all began when you were first married.  You were connected to each other as you looked longingly into each other’s eyes and hung on to every word.  Nothing could seemingly break through the moment! As the years have passed on, you continued to date, talk, gaze, make deposits in your marriage, and work every day at that which only you and your spouse shared.  Today, that intimacy, that private closeness/togetherness, is so strong that nothing can replace it.  That’s what God meant when he said of Adam and Eve, And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed (Genesis 2:25) This is pure intimacy on every level of marriage, physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.

So, does it feel like 35 years of marriage?  Yes.  35 years of a closeness that is priceless.  By the way, we are working today on 36 years.

3 thoughts on “The Gift of 35 Years

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