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Continuing the journey of intimacy

Today I will end the week of posts with the last of six reasons why marriage matters (#mondaymarriagematters).

Marriage matters because of its unique intimacy.

And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed (Genesis 2:25).

The greatest relationship in all the world is found in the redemptive, justifying work of Jesus Christ on the cross that makes us, who were at one time enemies of God, now reconciled to God, and no longer at enmity with God but set apart to Him for eternity (Romans 3:9-31; 5:1-11; Colossians 1:20-22).  That relationship is offered to all men by faith in the death, burial and resurrection of Christ (John 1:12; 1 Corinthians 15:3-4; Ephesians 2:8-9; 2 Peter 1:2-4).  The cross and resurrection proves that God the Father sent His Son to reconcile the world back to Himself to be restored to eternal fellowship (John 3:16).

There is another special relationship that cannot be duplicated on this planet in any other union except between what God has ordained between only a man and a woman.  That uniqueness is the intimacy found in a husband-wife relationship.  For intimacy to flourish in a marriage relationship to its highest level there must be integrity, trust, and openness.  Adam and Eve were completely at ease with each other at this highest level because at this point in the narrative there was no evil.  There was genuine, pure openness.  Even though evil abounds in our world and in our hearts (Jeremiah 17:9), genuine believers in Christ have the power through the Holy Spirit and the Word of God to experience blessed intimacy with God the Father and in marriage (John 14:16-23; 15:1-27; Romans 8:1-39; Ephesians 5:18-33).

Marriage matters every day of the week, month, year and your life.  As you grow in your intimacy with your spouse, you will be glad you took intimacy seriously.

Here’s my testimony to intimacy that I hope will encourage you: The Gift of 35 Years

The Gift of 35 Years


Monday, my wife and I celebrated our 35th Wedding Anniversary!  Someone asked me, in all seriousness, “Does it really feel like 35 years?”  Well, the truth is, yes.  Now, I really don’t know what 35 years is supposed to feel like, but I will tell what 35 years has provided that is priceless—intimacy.

Now, the world has its own idea of what intimacy is, but for a couple that has used their 35 years to get to know each other, I will say the world doesn’t have a clue.  Intimacy is that special private bond between a couple that only they can understand, express, and enjoy.  They have worked at communicating with each other over the years through words, actions, gestures, deeds, the good and the hard. They have opened their hearts to each other through trust, vulnerability, risks, and faith.  They have developed a love language that is only translated by each other.  They have created a sense of security within that bond that allows for freedom, rest, and assurance.  There’s an ease in each other’s presence that never carries any guilt or regrets whether you are on the beach, in the kitchen, driving in the car or in the bedroom.  They may be in a very public place, but in an instant, they can be in a private world that no one can comprehend.

Intimacy comes through daily giving of yourself to each other in serving, loving, listening, caring, gazing, and connecting.  It all began when you were first married.  You were connected to each other as you looked longingly into each other’s eyes and hung on to every word.  Nothing could seemingly break through the moment! As the years have passed on, you continued to date, talk, gaze, make deposits in your marriage, and work every day at that which only you and your spouse shared.  Today, that intimacy, that private closeness/togetherness, is so strong that nothing can replace it.  That’s what God meant when he said of Adam and Eve, And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed (Genesis 2:25) This is pure intimacy on every level of marriage, physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.

So, does it feel like 35 years of marriage?  Yes.  35 years of a closeness that is priceless.  By the way, we are working today on 36 years.