“Enjoying the Pleasures; Avoiding the Potholes”
As we continue on the scenic route taking in all the pleasures of marriage, let’s move from Protection (Scenic Route Posts #4 – #7) to . . . Pillow. Pillow? Yes, pillow, and no, it’s not time to take a nap!
Husbands, your wife needs your shoulder. If you a born again believer, God has some words for you.
Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God (1 John 4:7).
Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ (Galatians 6:2).
Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God (2 Corinthians 1:3-4).
Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you (Ephesians 4:32).
Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered (1 Peter 3:7).
Note the word weaker. I totally understand that in many ways a woman is stronger than a man. For instance, childbirth. Some women are more intelligent than men. But she is still called the weaker vessel. Husbands, if she is the weaker vessel, then you are the weak vessel. Both of you are in need of daily grace, and everyday your wife needs to be given grace and shown compassion by her husband.
What does this mean? The wife is weak in that God made her to be under your loving, caring, understanding headship in the relationship, and He made her to be a responder to you. She is your precious vessel to be treasured.
Men, as we saw in the earlier posts, our wives are not wired like us. So, when they are crying about something, moved emotionally, thinking like a woman, they don’t need correction, they need us to coddle them, to cuddle up with them. They don’t need our logical solutions at that moment, they just need loving hugs, soft words, and a shoulder to lean on.
My wife loves cats!!!! Well, the other night as she was coming home, a precious feline ran across the road in front of her Jeep, and . . . you know the rest of the story. When she entered the door, she was absolutely overcome by it all. As I held her, through her tears she told me what had occurred. She was fearful the cat was injured and still alive. What I am to do?
Knowing her concern, I placed a shovel in the back of her Jeep and proceeded to drive down our country road to check out this unfortunate cat’s condition. Well, she did a thorough job. I pulled over, dug a hole by the side of the road, buried the cat, and returned home. She was waiting to hear the news. I took her in my arms, held her tight and told her that I had found the cat and buried it. Once again, she wept as I held her tight.
That night, I was her hero, her knight in shining armor. I wish I could say that was always the case. Nevertheless, husbands, your wife needs you to be her pillow. She needs you to bear her burdens, to love her as God loves us through His Son, to be kind and tender-hearted, to dwell with your weaker vessel in an understanding way.
On the scenic route, pulling over beside the road, turning off the engine, and taking in the views is a whole lot better when she has her head on your shoulder and all is quiet around you.
Men, are your shoulders a soft pillow or a hard stone?