Know What We Were Doing . . . ?

This past week, my wife and I have been recalling some of the events of our first week of married life which all began on June 20, 1981. We would say to each other, “Know what we were doing today 39 years ago?”

We reminisced to an outdoor gospel sing by the Inspirations at Inspiration Park in Bryson City, NC; to what we ate during our honeymoon week (Hamburger Helper, Pork Chop Casserole, Golden Grahams cereal); to the eight-sided cabin on Lake Santeetlah, NC, “in the middle of nowhere;” to where we attended Sunday morning service in Robbinsville, NC; to our drive through the Smokies to Gatlinburg; to our “hike” up Clingman’s Dome on the spur-of-the-moment (Denise was still wearing her Sunday dress and heels. I carried her 3/4 of the way…seriously.); to our stay at Rocky Waters Motel in Gatlinburg in which we had only enough money left over to buy two TV dinners for supper which we thoroughly enjoyed on our room balcony!! I promise you, the adventures have continued!!

Recently my wife shared a quote with me she had heard on a podcast about marriage. “Couples who have been married for over 35 years enjoy their marriage as much as the first year.”

One of the key ingredients, among others to accomplishing a refreshing marriage, is husband and wife must make many more investments in their marriage than withdrawals, and that is every day.

Our marriage, like every one else’s, has had days of rocky waters, no pun intended. Praise the Lord for His grace to enable us to work through those churning, troubling moments and days.

In order to look back over your marriage with joy and a good dose of sentimentality, you must . . .

  • Live in the world of forgiveness and not apologies.
  • Never stop dating.
  • Always keep your spouse above your children.
  • Pray together.
  • Laugh a lot.
  • Learn to listen.
  • Share the Word together.
  • Shut out the world.
  • Enjoy romance.
  • Make frequent trips, husband, to Kroger’s for those $10 dozen roses! (Sometimes on sale for $8)
  • Do things out of the ordinary.
  • Hold hands and pray together before you go to bed.
  • Put down your cellphone or tablet.
  • Take the lead, men, and ladies, let him lead.
  • Walk in humility.
  • Never speak of your spouse in a negative fashion in public nor run to your parents when there’s a conflict.
  • Hold hands, kiss, cuddle, etc. like you did or wanted to do when you were dating. Have at it now! It’s legal and fun!!
  • Be a servant.
  • Adore each other.
  • Don’t be a “tight-wad” all the time, guys. Splurge on your sweetheart once-in-awhile.
  • Prepare your children to leave home.

There are many, many other things to add, but let me just ask, “What were you doing ____ years ago?”

Let your fountain be blessed,
and rejoice in the wife of your youth,
a lovely deer, a graceful doe.
Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight;
be intoxicated always in her love.
(Proverbs 5:18-19)

We’re Still Havin’ Fun!

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Today, Denise and I celebrate 36 years of marriage!  What a ride!  We’ve had our “ups” as we anticipated what may come ahead, our “downs” that almost took our breath away, and “twists and turns” that had us leaning against each other and the Lord with our hands in the air or holding on for dear life!

Truth is, the journey has been, is, and will continue to be fantastic!!  Outside of my personal relationship with God the Father through Christ Jesus alone (John 3:16; 10:28-30; Romans 10:9-13), being married to my precious, adorable sweetheart has been the best part of my life!

Having said that, today has not turned out as expected or planned.  Our original destination for two nights was a beautiful bed & breakfast tucked back in the woods along Watts Bar Lake, Whitestone Inn.  That had to be cancelled Monday morning.

Plan #2 was the option of a) Brunch at Well-Bred Bakery, Weaverville, NC, and then Afternoon Tea at the Biltmore Inn, followed up with a drive up the Blue Ridge Parkway to a cottage on Watauga Lake, or b) Brunch at Blackbird Bakery, Bristol, VA and dinner at The Mast Farm Inn, Valle Crucis, NC, with a stay at the cottage.  That had to be cancelled last night.

For a long time now, I have cut out the Love Is cartoons from the newspaper (Yes, I still read a daily newspaper!), and leave them somewhere for Denise.  Today’s cartoon sums up our 36th Anniversary.

Love Is cartoon

No matter, we are still havin’ fun . . . even though Denise has been sick since last Thursday with last night being the worst. (Doesn’t sound like much fun to her, I’m sure, bless her heart.)

What a gal!  Even though she didn’t feel good, she got up, fixed her hair, did the makeup routine, and put on something she knew I liked and would be comfortable for her.  I “scolded” her for going to such trouble, but her reply, “I wanted to look good for you on our anniversary.”  Tear in the eye right there and an enlarged heart!  She’s a keeper!!

Near noon she said in the words of Pooh Bear, “My tummy’s rumbling.”  “What sounds good to you,” I asked.  Her reply surprised me, “Onion rings!”  Well, that demanded a take-out order from Cheddar’s for a World-Class Chicken sandwich, cole slaw, and onion rings.  As we sat on the back porch, one of our most favorite spots in the world, we enjoyed our meal, although she didn’t eat much, and I read my anniversary card from her.  . . tears and an enlarged heart, again!

Today is a very special day for us, and we like to make much of special days.  But in reality, today is like any other day because being married to Denise is special and marriage is very special.  That’s why we work at it every day, seriously.

We’re still havin’ fun, and she’s still the one . . . ‘til death do us part or Christ comes in the rapture (1Thessalonians 4:13-18).

What’s fun special about your marriage today?  It’s your choice.

From a pastor’s heart,

Dale

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